Haiku Horoscopes2018-05-04T14:27:08+00:00

Haiku Horoscopes

I write humorous
horoscopes in haiku form:
Haiku Horoscopes

Also, on twitter,
@haikuhoroscopes will
tickle your fancy

Your Sign This Week

Aquarius

Your theory that the
Stars influence fate sounds, um,
Very familiar

Aries

Nothing makes people
Laugh more than thinking about
Their impending deaths

Cancer

Your house will increase
In value as soon as you
Dispel that old curse

Capricorn

Property values
Surrounding your hot tub have
Taken a nosedive

Gemini

You should brush up on
Your language skills by speaking
Esperanto more

Leo

Don’t rely on the
Kindness of strangers unless
You have a great bod

Libra

You misunderstood—
I did not say to invest
Your money in socks

Pisces

Moving can be quite
Stressful, so stop all of your
Bodily functions

Scorpio

Your decision to
Donate your brain to science
Has set science back

Taurus

Your YouTube film will
Go viral and wipe out all
Life on the planet

Virgo

E-mail and texting
Are both over with—now it’s
All about long knives

Archives by Sign

Aquarius
Aries
Cancer
Capricorn
Gemini
Leo
Libra
Pisces
Sagittarius
Scorpio
Taurus
Virgo

About Our Practice

Phasellus non ante ac dui sagittis volutpat. Curabitur a quam nisl. Nam est elit, congue et quam id, laoreet consequat erat. Aenean porta placerat efficitur. Vestibulum et dictum massa, ac finibus turpis.

Recent Posts

Contact Info

12345 West Elm Street

Phone: 1.888.456.7890

Fax: 1.888.654.9876

Web: Buy Avada Today!