“Why do your signed books cost so much?”
I’m not charging for my signature! I just sell the books at their full price, whereas other places sell them at discounts. I don’t discount my books because I want you to buy them from my publisher or an independent bookstore instead.
“Can I hire you/Can I buy film rights or otherwise license your work?”
Probably. Please contact me with details at email@example.com
“Do you want to see my remix/Can I remix something of yours?”
YES! You can e-mail your remixes to firstname.lastname@example.org or mail hard copies to me via the contact information above. All information about doing your own remix of my work is on the remix page. That’s also where I will post your remixes, when I can.
“Will you let me overbook into your course?”
No. Except in exceptional cases, I am not able to accommodate students who want to overbook into any course, for a host of reasons.
“Will you write me a letter of reference?”
If you are on the website looking for the answer to this question, then you probably won’t get a letter of reference from me, nor should you want one. Surely there is somebody you know better, and who knows you better, than the guy you vaguely recall taking a class with, who you had to re-discover via his website.
“Will you review my book?”
Maybe. Please send me your book (see the contact information on the sidebar). I can’t promise to read or review your book, but probably I will read it, and possibly I will review it. It’s more likely that I will read and review poetry than other types of books. Unlike other reviewers, I mostly select what books I review, rather than having them assigned to me for review. As a result, I mostly review books I wanted to read in the first place, and then finished reading of my own volition — in other words, I am more likely to review your book if it is excellent than if it is timely or otherwise something another person would review.
“Can I write a guest post for your site?”
Maybe. I have been hesitant about this because most people who want to write guest posts are secretly trying to advertise something or simply are writers of bullshit. If you are neither, then tell me all about your idea via email@example.com
“Will you interview me for this site?”
If you want to participate in one of the interview series, then please introduce yourself at firstname.lastname@example.org
“Where can I buy an e-book version of Ex Machina?”
You can’t, sorry. But who knows what the future will bring?
“I bought a print copy of Clockfire and/or The Politics of Knives — how do I get my free e-book?”
Visit the Coach House Books website for the scoop: http://www.chbooks.com/digital
“Can I use your artwork?”
You want to talk to the Jonathan Ball who can actually draw.
“Are you publishing my book, or what?”
You want to talk to Jonathan Ball of Jonathan Ball Publishers (which has no affiliation with me, sad to say).